A Bend in the Road: Babes in Catalunya

The kids.

I'd say they are thriving.

It was sort of a blessing and a curse that they are so young while we are having this adventure. A blessing that they are too young to have close friendships or ties to school that would make this transition hard for them, but a curse because they really won't remember much of this experience looking back. But I have to think, by being here in a big city and traveling together as a family, we are creating an environment that is conducive to learning and growing -- they may not remember every detail, or leave speaking fluent Spanish, but they will have the opportunity to see and experience things that expand their minds and encourage their curiosity. At least, I hope this is the case.

In their little love bug at Poblenou's summer carnival

Overall, the transition for them was fairly seamless due to their ages. However, I will say, coming back from our US visit this summer was a bit sad. Evan started crying when he saw our front door in Barcelona as we pulled up in the cab from the airport, and it broke my heart. He is a family man, that Evan, and loved the time spent with his grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. I think it was hard for him to see our house here, and realize that meant we were far away again and wouldn't be back for a while. He did readjust quickly though, and we make sure to talk about family, show pictures, and remind him we can always talk on the computer with everyone whenever he wants. Though, those two have Skype ADD, and the time change with their early bedtimes will forever make it difficult. We will keep at it though, because I know how important ongoing contact is for us all...it is always something I want to keep working at improving on.

But then there are the positives...

Here in Barcelona, and perhaps Spain in general, people have a special affection for children. I've mentioned this before, but I'd say 8 out of 10 people we pass on the street either stop to talk, or at least smile and pat the children's heads, as we walk by. When they have little fits on the metro, there is usually an elderly woman near by who scoots down to distract Mia with her hand fan, or tickle her legs to make her laugh. It's a nice way to grow up, in my opinion. Having the whole world smile at you. Children are included in everything...it doesn't matter how nice the restaurant is, how dangerous the festival is, or how late in the evening it is, children are there. Families are together. And while I, personally, enjoy a nice adult meal without the kids now and then, and know when it is better (for my own sanity) to leave them home...I can really appreciate the inclusion, acceptance, and love people have for children here.

People from home ask me a lot if they are learning Spanish -- yes, but only a little. They have their greetings down, and Evan completely recognizes what is Spanish and what is English as it is spoken. It is true, at their age they are little language sponges ripe for learning and absorbing. However, since we speak English at home, it really only works if they are put into a native school. Here in Barcelona, the vast majority of children start school at age 3 -- and it is not "pre-school", they go to school just like 1st graders, all day everyday. Additionally, the public schools here are all in Catalan -- pretty much a completely different language from Spanish. So, while technically Evan could be enrolled in public school here in Barcelona at his age, I wasn't thrilled with him spending 8 hours a day, every day, at school at age 3, and also wasn't super concerned with him learning Catalan since it is really only spoken in this region of the world. Last spring, after we arrived, we had him enrolled in an international pre-school in the mornings. They had four language groups: Spanish, Catalan, German, and English. He loved it, but since they strongly urged us to stick with the English group, he wasn't hearing a whole lot of Spanish other than from the other kids on the playground.

This school year we decided to just forgo pre-school altogether and send Evan to the pre-school of life :) Diverting the tuition cost towards extra travel seemed prudent at this stage of the game -- especially since I'm home entertaining Mia all day anyway. We figure, if we can show them more of the world in exchange for giving up circle time and runny noses, then we want to do it. Kindergarten will still be there waiting for him when we return to the US in a few years.

So I'm up to my ears in toddlers these days, but, in a way they are entering a really nice stage making it easier when they are both together doing the same things, eating, and napping together. They fight, of course, but I'm also starting to notice more and more that they really look to have the other close by at all times, and are finally starting to engage each other in play. Mia will always adore Evan, but it took Evan a solid two years to accept that Mia, is indeed, here to stay and he might as well play with her, or at the very least, try and keep her alive. They are starting to ask lots of questions about they way the world works, and making up their own little scenarios and ideas. I'm no longer spending the day with little grunting, tottering little blobs (and I mean that with the greatest of affection), they are actually their own little people now and I feel very lucky to be able witness this.

It is never boring. Never. We have a lot of parks and playgrounds close by, we run errands, we go to bookstores, and also have a playgroup we recently started going to one day per week. It is a lot of balancing getting household stuff done, providing some stimulating activity for them (this does not always happen), and getting every one's basic needs met. I will say it is MUCH easier now that we have almost fully adjusted to living here. We have our routines, we know what we need, and where to get it. I'm quickly forgetting those early weeks here when it felt like our entire world was turned upside down, and I didn't know which way was up...Life feels manageable, and dare I say it, normal?

Like every mother, I have moments of the day when I am one tantrum away from curling up in a ball and rocking myself in the corner of the room. And for a while, it was easy to sort of get lost in that, especially when it was compounded by the frustrations that come with moving abroad. But I've recently started trying to look at each day as an opportunity to make something great -- if I don't, I start to drown in the squabbles and the routines and to me, that is a waste of our time here and my time with my children. Yeah, it is damn hard, but, it is also hilarious and rewarding spending all day with two of my favorite people in the world. If we make chocolate chip cookies, we shall eat them in a fort. If it is raining and we have cabin fever, then we will put on our crocs and bathing suits and find puddles to splash in. And if all else fails, I pour a glass of wine and turn on Pocoyo. Because sometimes that is pretty great too. I will do the best I can, make the most of what I can, and forgive myself when I don't.

Bottom line is, they are happy. They are doing what almost 2 year-olds and 3 year olds do. They are finding their independence, spreading their wings, and peeing all over the toilet seat. Life is good.