Putting it Out There - Have to Start Somewhere

I've been neglecting my blog.

The one place that will hold our memories, experiences, thoughts, plans, reactions, fortunes and misfortunes...has been left sad and lonely for weeks.  I intended to start this blog so I could remember this short and life-changing experience from beginning to end, and to stay connected with friends and family back home.  Yet, as the weeks fall by, and important moments like our first Christmas, New Years Eve, and Three Kings drift further and further behind me... suddenly this blog is feeling more like a term paper I just don't want to start. 

My blog entries were sparse when we first arrived because I was so overwhelmed with life I had no brain power or time to write at the end of the day when the kids were finally in bed.  Now I am faced with a whole new roadblock -- peace and normalcy have resumed, but (my perception of) the magnitude of our experiences, both sensory and emotional, have been such that it is intimidating for me to attempt to capture it in writing.  If I can't capture what we are seeing and feeling in exactly the right way, or invoke the same feelings in print as it was experienced, then what's the point, really.  I write.  I re-read.  I revise.  I edit, and write some more.  It doesn't feel right unless it looks the way I envisioned it would look when I set out writing.  I am a perfectionist with no patience.  And so... I watch Top Chef. 

This all ends here. 

 

We are coming up on our one year anniversary here in Spain, and my belated new years resolution is to write at least every few days.  It won't be perfect.  It won't always be an exact representation of our thoughts or adventures, but at least it will be out there.  Our memories captured.  I don't want to just look at pictures in 10 years and think...where did those two years go?   What was our day to day life in Spain like?  Like our wedding day.  I wish someone had told me to wake up the next morning, and write down everything I could remember from the day before, because really -- you don't remember much from your wedding day.  I would kill to know what every hour of that day was like.  And so, I want to remember this.  Because what is happening right now is significant in our lives.  I feel that.

In the week ahead, I have some catching up to do, but my hope is that eventually this blog will become more of a weekly journal into our journey here, rather than random chapters of a book. 

Here's hoping anyway. 

In the spirit of a more "in the moment" attitude, here are some pictures from today.  Rocking the new watercolor set from Christmas, and new smocks!

I don't know why I bother giving them paper...really, they just want to paint their faces.

See you in a few days.