A Year in Review

February 15th marks our one year anniversary living here in Spain.  

 

The two nights before we left -- February 13th, 2012

 

This year has been such a wild ride.  I think initially planning this move, we assumed it would be two years of pure culture and adventure.  Having both happily lived abroad previously, I think we underestimated what the adjustment period would look like here in Spain.  I had no idea what kind of challenges this move would involve, and that the initial period of difficulty and frustration, as we tried to integrate our little family into this Spanish life, would throw us a bit for a loop.  Because it did.   I think it was one of the most emotionally exhausting years of my life -- intense highs, intense lows, questioning who you are and what is important.  This kind of lifestyle has a way of stripping our skin off to the bone, and exposing  insecurities and fears you didn't even know existed.  There are times you feel judged...for not knowing the language well enough, for no longer being a "career woman", for not rolling with the punches as easily as you hoped, or for not wandering around in an eternal state of bliss and thankfulness...and of course, the hardest part of it all, was being away from our families.  Not having the kids around their relatives, and missing those random Friday afternoon phone calls to my sister in the car.  The guilt about being away can be intense at times, even though everyone has always been, and continues to be, so supportive of our decision to move here.  Regardless, I know, ultimately, we made it out on the other side of this year a stronger family.  We've learned things about ourselves, and each other, we never would have learned without going through this experience together.  

 

And with these struggles, were victories.  For starters, I got to spend all day, every day with my children.  I know this is something to be incredibly thankful for, as this would not have been the case if we were still living in the US.  I was there with them through it all -- the cuddles, the fights, the stories, and the tears.  I was there.  It's time I will be forever grateful for looking back on this experience.  

 

 

I learned how to slow down -- mentally.  I haven't perfected it, and often have to remind myself to do it, but I'm trying to be more present in my life.  To be fully aware of each moment, and not constantly be thinking ahead to the next hour, day, or year.  Life is not a to-do list.  And happiness is a decision.  Be the person you want to be, and live the life you want to have.  You don't need anyone to tell you what kind of person you are.  There will always be times when the negativity takes over...and that's OK too.  Acknowledge it, feel it, then let it go and move on.  Keep trying to be the best version of yourself.  

I also learned that my husband has an incredible ability to rise to the occasion. I am so proud of what he has achieved this year.  He came into his first management role, and knocked it out of the park.  Not only this, but I truly do admire his effort to learn the language and how has fully embraced everything about Spanish living (almost to an obnoxious degree -- we joked early on he was having a Catalan identity crisis and he truly believed he was now Catalan).  He has always been a very friendly, outgoing person, but he managed to come into a work environment -- a team almost entirely made up of local Catalans and other Europeans speaking mostly in their native language among themselves -- and win them over.  He is a strong man, who has shouldered the burdens and stresses of a new work role and environment, and managed to come home and be emotionally supportive to me and the children as well.  I'm very, very proud.

 

 

 

We met some new, fantastic friends. Some through Chris's work, some from our town, and it has been a very new experience for me to be pushing past those initial getting-to-know-you stages, and moving right into the trusted friend stage. Some friends have since left Barcelona, some are still here...some friendships are just beginning. But I'm especially thankful to my close group of friends that picked me up during my first few months of struggles, dusted me off, and opened my eyes to the beauty of life here in Barcelona.  Whether it was with a day laying under a cabana in Sitges, early morning "venting" coffee, trips to Rome, Sunday lunches, or midnight birthday whiskey shots -- they brought me back to life, and I will be forever grateful and bonded to some of the amazing friends I've made here.

 

 

 

 

And then, of course, there is the travel.  The incredible places we've seen this year...that has always been some of our happiest times.  We learned we travel really well as a family.  Chris and I feed off of seeing a place for the first time.  Getting into a rental car, and driving down an unfamiliar highway to a place we've never been...for us, there is nothing better.  Here are some highlights from our travel this year:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If I could sum up our first year, it would be mostly a period of adjustment.  Learning to let go of rules and expectations, and live more freely with a lighter heart.   I can fairly confidently say we have hit our stride here.  It feels like home, and we always have this happy feeling when we arrive back in the Barcelona airport...it's hard to explain, but it just feels good to be here.  The sun is always shining, the life is slow and purposeful, and the real value is in spending time as a family. 

I'm excited to see what is in store for us in year two...my hope is that we continue to push ourselves and focus on the small victories along the way.  I hope we continue to try and integrate ourselves in this community and lifestyle.  We will always be Americans, and will always miss some of the comforts of home, but my hope is that we can be fully present this year as we suck the marrow out of what this experience has to offer.  I don't want to let what is "easy" or "convenient" dictate what we do or where we go...I want to dive in, head first, and live the hell out of this year.  It's a beautiful world, and I will always be forever grateful for this two year reminder of just what is out there beyond our comfort zone.