Not a good "Spain day"

I have found, since arriving here in Barcelona, that each day can be classified as one of two things: a good "Spain day", or a not so good "Spain day" (I don't want to say a bad "Spain day", since, like pizza, even when it's bad it's still pretty good). The good days are amazing. These are the days I find a new Spanish treasure, have a short conversation in Spanish, and enjoy the day with my family in this incredible city. Yesterday? Not a good "Spain day". Unfortunately, our time here will not always be filled with delicious tapas, palm trees, and Gaudi. Some days are going to be frustrating, tear-inducing messes. And if I write about the good, I should also write about the bad.

I had the false notion that once we arrived, the days of errands, to-do lists, and day-to-day toddler drama would somehow be replaced by leisurely lunches, park runs, and collecting fresh food for dinner that night. Kind of like when I thought my maternity leave with Evan would be like a 3 month vacation...hahahahahahahahahahahaha. Not so. As much as we tried to avoid it, we still have a laundry list of unfinished business back home. Stuff like putting all the house stuff to bed, canceling accounts, changing addresses for important accounts, finishing my NP recertification application, etc. etc. Nothing that won't be gone in a month or two, but still, added to our to-do list here, it seems excessive. And now that we are in Spain, the fun-filled immigration paperwork hasn't ended: registering with city hall, NIE cards, finding doctors/vets, all culminating with a trip back to the US for me next month to get my visa, which oddly enough took EIGHT WEEKS to complete. If anyone is ever curious about the process of moving to Spain, just watch this video, it pretty much sums it up. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXWZ3uAEKsw The Spanish folks are lovely people, but the red tape and bureaucracies are semi out of control.

We are mostly unpacked, but still have artwork to hang, clothes to wash, housewares to buy, etc. Right now, as far as extras go, we are pretty bare bones...no TV, no washer dryer, no microwave, no coffee maker, no toaster, no cell phone (for me), no house phone. We just got a dishwasher yesterday. Basically we have places to eat and sleep, and computers. So, each day I sit down and decide what is realistically going to get done that day, what absolutely needs to get done that day, then make a list and make a plan. Most days, it takes all day to find and purchase food for lunch and dinner, and make sure the kids are fed, dry, rested, and happy. And until yesterday, I was OK with that. We haven't found our groove or routine yet, so I'm trying to just go with flow for a while until life resumes some kind of normalcy. It actually reminds me a lot of right after you have a baby, when life is just total chaos for six months, then suddenly you know what you are doing and can function again.

Yesterday, I decided that, no matter what, I needed to go to the local mall to buy some much needed items. Chris and I discovered a rather large indoor shopping mall within walking distance last week, full of stores we needed including FNAC (books and electronics) and Media Markt (sort of like Best Buy). Walking distance is key--I had stupidly attempted to take the metro alone with the kids and stroller last week. The metro system is easy enough to figure out, the problem was that there are about 50 little staircases inside the metro between connecting trains. It took me an hour of sweating it out, carrying Mia and the stroller, while simultaneously holding Evan's hand walking up and down the staircases. By the time I got to where I was going, I was so tired, I just wanted to go home. I filed that one under "never again", and vowed to only take the metro with Mia in the Ergo, and Evan walking. With Chris and I both there to carry the stroller, it isn't bad, but with one person it is just not worth the effort. So, knowing this, I had decided to hit up the local shopping mall that, thankfully, is within walking distance from our house. About 1-2 miles away. 

There were a few items I felt were easy enough to carry home in the stroller, and would make life a little easier at home: a toaster, a coffee maker, and a no-slip bathmat. We are a big toast family in the morning, and after two weeks of unsuccessfully trying to toast bread in this oven, I needed a toaster. You would think it is simple to figure out an oven: bake or broil. No. There are about 8 different hieroglyphic-like symbols to choose from on our oven. No words, just varying configurations of squiggly lines, straight lines, and dots on a turn dial. I've tried them all, and I'll be damned if I know what any of them mean. So yes, I needed a toaster. And as much as I love our local cafe and the delicioso cafe con leche it serves, I don't love having to get dressed and leave the house for coffee in the morning. I'm the kind of girl that sets the coffee maker the night before and hits it first thing in the morning. So coffee maker was also on the list. And a bath mat. Sounds trivial, but...we have no tub. I have to strip my children down, stand them in the shower, and point the shower sprayer at them hosing them off like prisoners as they shriek and scream (Evan laughing, Mia usually crying). After two weeks of having to hold one of their arms so they don't slip and break their neck during this fun process, a bath mat was in order.

So, that was the plan. Drop the laundry at the laundry mat (I'm so missing a washer right now), go to the mall, get those three items, and be home in time for lunch and nap. Sounded do-able, and I was determined. 

The day started off well...Mia napped in the morning while I got Evan and I dressed and cleaned up breakfast. I loaded up 1/2 the double stroller with all the laundry, and got my cafe con leche from across the way. Chris headed to work, and I waited for Mia to get up. Once Mia was up, I popped her in the Ergo baby on my back, got Evan in the stroller, and headed out. We managed to get to the laundry mat without any of the mammoth sized laundry bags falling over onto Evan's side of the stroller, yet, in our usual circus-like fashion, we busted through the tiny doors of the mom-and-pop shop laundromat...laundry bags falling all over the place. I put on my calmest face, smiled at the shop keeper and said "Hola". The owner of this shop is this adorable Catalan woman...tiny, little 4ft lady, with a gray bun and friendly eyes. She is sweet, speaks not a word of English, and will often shake her head mutter words I don't understand, usually along the lines of "muy grande" as she takes in how much laundry I have brought her that day. Today, there was another older woman just hanging out in the Laundromat. I've noticed this happens a lot around here. People just hanging out in stores chatting it up with the owner. Like, for hours. Another thing that happens a lot, which is completely endearing and wonderful, is that old Catalan women will stop all the time to look at the kids and talk to them, which is super cute, even when I don't even know what they are saying. They LOVE children here. Well, this patron who happen to be there today, turned to Evan and started her endless string of Catalan, likely talking about him being cute and sweet. Except this woman was very loud, a little scary looking, and was talking so fast and so long she scared the be-jesus out of Evan. I can't really blame him...if a strange person started yelling gibberish at me, I would probably freak out a little too. So Evan burst into tears, and I smiled, unloaded the bags, said "Adios", and headed out the door.

Off we went to the mall, Evan already in a bad state of mind, and us rushing to get there before the kids get hungry again. We make it to the mall, and I remind myself of the plan: Media Markt for a coffee maker and toaster, Chiccos for the bathmat. Except I pass by Alcampo...this HUGE store that looks like Target with one floor of groceries and one floor of household stuff. Thinking I could find some stuff I needed inside, I detour, breaking the first cardinal rule of doing errands with toddlers. Never, never detour. Regardless, I run in, and I find both the coffee maker and the toaster in Alcampo. Good prices, good selection. Then I broke the second cardinal rule of shopping with toddlers. I put the stuff back, and left without buying what I needed thinking I could get it cheaper somewhere else. Instead, I headed down to the grocery store level. Here, I was hoping to find baking products--flour, sugar, spices (oddly enough, I can't seem to find these things at the grocery stores here, or at least I haven't seen it yet). Halfway through the search, the kids start getting whiney and hungry, so I abort the mission, and head to the food court for refreshments. Never a good sign when we've been out for almost an hour, we have nothing to show for it, and already I'm burning more time feeding them. We grab some yogurt, muffins, and a banana for the kids, a second coffee for me, and refuel. The kids eat it all pretty quickly, so I grab my coffee, grab the stroller, and get going to media markt. I soon realize that navigating the double stroller in the tiny, electronic lined aisles of this store is not so easy, so I tuck the coffee cup in the back of the stroller in the netting so I have both hands free. I head right to the kitchen appliance aisle, sensing the limited time I have left...except the same coffee makers and toasters are way more expensive here, and they don't have nearly as much selection as Alcampo did. So, again, I leave empty handed, and head to Chiccos for the bathmat. Inside Chiccos is a little play area with two slides, little bikes, and a little house. The kids see this, and immediately start yelling to get out and play...so I let them out to play as I grab the bathmat and a nightlight for Mia. I let them play, 10 minutes go by, and I am realizing it is getting late, and we still have to get what we came for. So I get Evan back in the stroller and grab Mia, who is now power walking through the store determined to lose me. She screams the second I grab her to put her in the stroller. Out we go, screaming Mia and all, and head back to Alcampo...upon entrance, Evan yells "NO! NO! NO!" (my kids LOOOOOVE shopping), and I put on my happy calm face and grab the first toaster and coffee maker I see, and jog it out to the checkout--finish line is in sight, and damn it, I'm going to get there. Checking out can be tricky here in Spain...it took me a while to figure out all the questions they will ask you in Spanish..."do you need a bag?" (if you don't bring a reusable bag with you to stores, they charge you for a plastic one)..."for here or to take away"...etc. Furthermore, you have to bag your own stuff (groceries included) and they fly through checking people out so you have to bag at the speed of light in order to avoid looking like an idiot and holding up the whole line of people. This time, I had all my appropriate Spanish replies and reusable bags ready to go, but couldn't find my debit card, holding up the line of people as usual, and had two screaming kids in tow. Finally, we paid, and at this point I am flat out sweating. I quickly let down the back of the stroller seat that isn't being used, shove all the stuff in the stroller, and speed walk out of there eager to just get home already. I walk the entire length of the mall, exasperated and tired, but still proud I got what I came for, and stop at the mall exit to get everyone strapped in and organized, ready for the walk home. As I bend down getting my purse from under the stroller, I feel a tap on my shoulder and turn to see someone pointing to the back of the stroller seat, where the coffee I had put in there had tipped upside down when I put the back down in Alcampo, and was pouring out onto the floor. I looked behind us and saw a trail of coffee down the entire length of the mall. AWESOME. 

We made it home, an hour later than expected, and after a quick lunch I put the kids down for nap. As I lay Mia down, I am realizing that she is feeling pretty hot, and flushed...turns out, she has a temperature of 104. Ahhh, that would explain the grumpiness. Poor little thing is just grumpy and clingy and just wants to be laying on me for the rest of the night. I'll cut to the chase here--the day was capped off by Mia throwing up on me, and spending the night by my side in bed in fitful bursts of sleep, punctuated with bouts of crying. Just not a great day. 

I will say, that I know enough to leave these kinds of days where they belong-- behind me. I try not to dwell on the hard parts of living here, and look at these kinds of days as lessons moving forward. Every day that I stumble through a conversation, or arrive somewhere unprepared, I know what to say and do the next time. I look up the words I did not know, prepare myself to answer the questions I was asked, and realize that this is all a learning process. The Spanish have a phrase they like to use when I apologize for not speaking Spanish very well: "Poco y poco" (at least, that is how I think you spell it). It means, "little by little". For me, this is hard. I want everything mastered yesterday. I want to find what I need, speak the language, make new friends, find a work niche here... But, I try to remind myself that this will all take time, and so will knowing how best to integrate mothering two little children into all of it. Poco y poco. I will get there. We all will. It is the challenges in life that truly make life worth living. It pushes you beyond your comfort zone, beyond your own knowledge and understanding, and in the end your life is richer because of it.

Almost two weeks already?!

Truth be told, I should have started this blog about two months ago. I had great intentions of chronicling this entire process of moving from start to finish, but I honestly just did not have the brain power. I still don't, but I refuse to miss any more of this experience, so it is time to start writing, taking pictures, and fire up the Spanish lessons again. Foggy brain or not, we are here! It may not be the most eloquent, entertaining, or grammatically correct blog at this point, but I want to share the daily challenges and experiences with our friends and family, and to remember what it was like during these first few months. So here it goes...

So here we are...day 11 in Spain. The first 11 days have been a complete roller coaster ride. Some of it expected, some of it very surprising. I think the hardest part for me is making the move with two young children in tow. Moving to a foreign country is sort of sensory overload at first--new sights, sounds, smells, tastes. Everything is new, and everything requires 10X more thought and effort than before. Now add into the mix two young children with jet lag who are hungry and tired and looking to have their needs met. It's been a bit much. And although, overall, I have been so impressed with Evan and Mia throughout this entire process, it doesn't change the fact that they are 1 and 3, and their needs come first. Thankfully, I know there will be a point when we find our stride, and get into a routine again. Things WILL get easier, and I know that once we find our new normal, our "Barcelona normal" will be much more enjoyable than "Rowley normal" was. We just have to survive until then!

It is always sort of an internal struggle with me...Half of me craves change and adventure...I think I was the one who wanted this relocation more than anyone. Yet, the other half of me craves order and calmness. I need routine, and I need to make sense of things, which seems to completely contradict the adventurous side. It feels like I'm always making huge life changes, then finding ways to cope with all the change! This experience is no different.

What we have found and learned this week...Well, for starters, the "landing" here was not so smooth. We learned quickly that urgency is not a word in the Spanish dictionary. As much as we planned to have our arrival coincide as closely as possible with the shipping of our US goods container, we found out soon after we arrived that between the shipping company and customs agents, the delivery of our furniture (and all household goods) may not happen for an additional week. We checked into a hotel--lugging the two pack and plays, and three suitcases--and tried to figure out what our next move should be. Thankfully, after two days of living in the hotel, we managed (well, Chris managed) to get the customs agents to cough up our stuff, and we moved into our new home last Friday--just in time for Molly to arrive.

Our apartment is amazing. Completely not what I expected to find living in Barcelona. We are on the ground level, so our front door opens directly out onto a pedestrian street. It is two levels--the first level is one huge open space that includes the living area and the kitchen, and opens out onto a little back yard area with a patio, little area of turf, small garden, and little swimming pool. Upstairs we have three bedrooms--two little adjacent rooms for the kids with huge windows that look out onto the back yard, and our room which is slightly larger and has a loft-like feature of looking out onto the first floor. There are lots of stairs and ledges which made me nervous moving here with two small children, but overall I've been pretty impressed with how quickly the kids have learned to navigate around here. Evan can now go up and down stairs completely unassisted, and is very mindful of the ledge downstairs. Mia has had some bumps along the way, but is learning. Our landlord very kindly roped off the pool, and installed a baby gate at the top of the stairs, which has been helpful. Once we are completely done unpacking, I plan to post some pictures.

We live in Poblenou, a very family oriented, mom-and-pop shop, old world kind of neighborhood. Sort of like the North End is to Boston. No one speaks English to you here (which is a good thing) and our street is lined with every shop you can imagine. A store just for olives. A store just for shoes. A store just for cheese. Bakeries, butchers, dog food, frozen food...every store is so specific. We have a huge Mercat (fresh market) just behind our house which is pretty amazing...It is a huge building filled with vendors selling everything you can imagine. Fresh meats, cheeses, breads, fish, fruits, veggies, prepared foods. Inside that building there is also a large grocery store (Mercadona) which is like our usual Shaws or Stop and Shop. Except MUCH smaller. It kind of cracks me up walking through and thinking about our stores in the US...in America, there is an entire cereal aisle. Here, there are about 10 cereals to choose from. Same with things like yogurt, juice, milk, and cheese. You have 3 or 4 options. Not 50 options. The one thing there is MORE of here is cheese. And ham. The Spanish folks love cheese and ham, and there is every kind you kind imagine. At first, I walked through, and couldn't find much of anything I needed. But everyday that I go, I find more and more...leather wipes, aluminum foil, etc. They just start popping out at me...same with the specialty stores. Yesterday I found a store just for toiletries that had all kinds of stuff we needed, and the day before I found a fabulous fruit and veggie stand that had a self service olive bar and seafood market inside. Score.

The kids have been great so far. Barcelona is made for children. It is interesting, they don't have a lot of the "kiddie" paraphernalia here. There are not a lot of kid oriented foods, or marketing for kids with TV shows or movie characters. There are no kiddie menus, or sippie cups. You see kids as young as 18 months or so, walking--not in strollers. Kids are not babied here...However, there is a HUGE emphasis on play, and I love it. There are playgrounds EVERYWHERE. Every 100 yards or so, there is a new play area for kids in this city. Even on the beaches, there are climbing structures for kids. The playgrounds here are packed. Filled with children all day long, and you see kids playing in the streets and in the parks with just a soccer ball or a bike. Even the stores here always seem to have a little slide or bike for kids to play with. Along the same lines, Barcelona is extremely pedestrian friendly. Where we live, along the beach, the walkways for pedestrians are bigger than the roads for the cars. There is a system here in Barcelona called Bicing--bikes that are available for use all over the city, you just use a card to unlock the bike, take it where you need to go, and leave it at that Bicing site for the next person. I love that there is so much green space here--parks, boardwalks, walkways, dog parks, children's playgrounds. There are little stone lounge chairs at the beach to lie on. This city is about enjoying your life. Quality of life.

And the dogs. They have it pretty good too. I wish someone had told me how dog friendly Barcelona actually was. We had heard it would be hard to find a dog friendly apartment, and that there were SOME dog parks here and there. Well, here in Poblenou, there are dogs EVERYWHERE. There are no leash laws, and everyone loves dogs here. I get stopped everyday by someone wanting to pet Molly. I brought her with us to the playground one day (mind you, dogs aren't allowed to step foot on playgrounds at home in the US), and had her tied up out of the way so she wouldn't bother any of the kids. An older woman came over, and I immediately thought she was going to yell at me for having a dog on the playground...well, she starts speaking affectionate words in Spanish to Molly, and turned to me saying, "Awwww, why don't you take her off the leash? Let her run!" Wow. Ok, not what I expected...but again, it's about quality of life around here. Dogs included.

There is so much more, but hard to write an entire 11 days worth of experiences in one sitting. I want to write about learning Spanish, the Catalans love of children, Chris's new office, our daily adventures, our recent trip to Park Guell, meeting new ex-pat friends, etc. etc...There is so much already to catch up on, but I guess I'll get there eventually. I'll get to specifics in future posts...with pictures too. But I had to start somewhere. It is Sunday today...everything is closed, supermarkets included, so it is a day of family and rest. We plan to head over to the beach, have lunch, and just relax today...and of course, keep up with the Spanish lessons. Oh, and we are meeting with a potential babysitter tonight so Mommy and Daddy can have some of our own adventures in the city at some point :)

Until next time...